losing to win...

So as you all know I am floored by all the things God is doing in my life and in Davids'. I am typing this at 12am, January 24th. As many of you know I lost someone quite precious to me this year. God BLESSED my life with a friendship that ended too soon. Josh and I became friends about 8 or 9 years ago while I was volunteering and interning with Youth For Christ. We became instant friends and spent countless hours together planning youth events and mostly just being silly. He had an infectious personality and an infectious love for Jesus. Without going into too much detail, I lost him suddenly and tragically. No words can really explain how my heart felt at that moment when the reality hit that he was in fact gone. My last encounter with him was after we ate lunch on Wednesday July 21st the day he died. We talked all about his new relationship and the plans they were making. I asked him if I could pray with him before he left, and of course we bowed our heads right there and I put my hand on his shoulder and prayed.

Since this I have been trying desperately to understand why God would allow this sweet precious godly man to leave this earth so soon. I know God has used the circumstances and his life for HIS glory. But I needed it to make sense to me and for me. What was God doing? I felt like I was wandering in a dessert. I was thirsty, but not in the physical sense but spiritually. Melinda, a sweet and dear friend told me about this book
"1000 Gifts"by Ann Voskamp.  
This is where the "New Story"  and Outlook on my life starts! It is extremely hard to be thankful in the midst of tragedy. I could feel my heart growing bitter and at times still do. My sense of fairness and justice have to be soothed by my Father in Heaven! This book is teaching me to live in a state of "Eucharisteo." This word has three meanings. Thanksgiving, Joy, and Grace. This year and the rest of my days need to be lived this way. Anne's blog "A holy experience" is quite incredible as well.

January 23 was titled

Why You Really Need to Think About Losing (Because This is how You Win)

http://www.aholyexperience.com/2012/01/why-you-really-need-to-think-about-losing-because-this-is-how-you-win/

This post by Ann is thought provoking! I now know why I lost Josh. (I shouldn't say lost, because I know exactly where he is.) It's so I could learn to Love! The people in my life are now more precious to me than ever. I am being more intentional with my time with them. I want the time to be quality and to love them more deeply and appreciate the time I have with them. I appreciate and love the time I had with Josh and focus on that not the time lost. I am thankful God placed Josh in my life when he did. Josh helped me see what being a "Real" fleshy christian was. He was not afraid to love people and share Jesus Passionately with them. I find myself falling in love with Jesus all over each day. His mercies are NEW every morning, Great is His Faithfulness.

So losing... is making me win! LOVE

This time that David and I apart has been a blessing, God is teaching me to love HIM more deeply and love David more deeply. It's funny how just a text is no longer "just" a text. It's knowing that David love me and is thinking about me. It makes me remember the days of dating... being intentional to let the other know you love them and care for them. It's easy during day to day life to forget to say and do those things. So far I have not been sad, I have not had any pity parties, and I am not lonely. I am Strong, I can do all thing through Christ who strengthens me. God is who sustains, comforts and my ever present help!

Signing off the!

The Wife

Controlled Chaos

Hello All,

            It’s been a while since I have posted, the training pace has picked up quite a bit so I have been fairly busy as of late. A lot has happened this week; so far I have trained on the Humvee and should receive my military license soon.

I had the opportunity to drive the Humvee on an off road course, during the day and at night wearing night vision goggles, which was quite awesome, I really enjoyed that training event.

                                  (this is not an image from the course, but this is how it looked)

Driving with NVG’s (night vision goggles) was strange at first, because it’s like your looking through a tube so you have blind spots which makes driving a little difficult, but once I became accustomed to it I was off and running.

Later this week, I had to complete roll over training, which is a simulator that looks like a Humvee that rolls over and you have to escape, it sounded easy when they were describing it. So basically a Humvee is a cramped 5 person capacity vehicle with a limited amount of room, and if you wear the amount of gear that was issued to use then it’s really tight. So they place you in the simulator and they give a basic scenario, they then roll you over upside down and give you the order to egress. Once you unbuckle yourself you drop about a foot, and then the fun begins at this point its knees, elbows and boots just flailing around trying to right yourself just so you can begin to find the doors and attempt to escape. It was tough when you are competing with four other folks to exit the simulator. At one point and time my head was wedged under the passenger seat and I was unable to move, as luck would have it I managed to free myself under all the controlled chaos and attempted to open the door, and that didn’t go so well, however one of the four managed to open his and everyone else headed for that door as it was the only available exit at the time. We had to do this while wearing all of our gear which made it that much more challenging. The vest we wear weighs 30 pounds which keeps keep you protected but adds to making the task much more difficult.

So needless to say it’s been busy and another week has passed by.

Thanks for all the prayers and God bless you all.

To be continued…..

That Dog or in my case DOGS! Plural for sure

Just to let you all know I have definitely been without company!! Meet my kids!

Meet Snapple Chicken Cloer

Breed: Dapple Daschund

Color: Graey Brown, and Black

Favorite Food: Watermelon and Peanut Butter frosty paws

Best Friend: Maverick (the dog next door)

Favorite place to sleep: My mommas Neck

Favorite Pastime: Stealing everyone elses toys and bones

Nicknames: Snickels, Nickels, Napple, Snickies

Meet Stewart Little Cloer

Breed: Rat Terrier Chihuahua

Color: Black and Grey

Favorite Food: Anything

Best Friend: I'm Old and angry Dog no FRIENDS

Favorite place to sleep: under all the covers

Favorite Past Time: Sleeping and snorting like a pig

Nicknames: Stu-doo, Doo Doo

Meet Sylva Peaches Cloer

Breed: Beagle Lab Mix

Color: Black and White

Favorite Food: Anything!!!

Best Friend: Maverick & Ellie

Favorite place to sleep: On top of mom

Favorite Pastime: Digging, Jumping, and Digging

Nicknames: Sizo

These dogs make sure that I am good. They are such snuggle bugs! I am so thankful for these guys. They make the nites not seem so lonely. 

Seriously though I have been doing well. I know you all are praying. I have been able to sleep through the nite and been able to do it without my mind reealing. God has helped me be still! He has given me a peace at nite that surpasses all understanding. 

David and I have gotten to talk over skpe and on the phone. Today I went and had Tea with my sweet g-mom and we skyped with David. G-mom was thrilled to be able to see and talk to him. I heart technology!!

Signing off 

The Wife

MAC-P

Hello all,

Well today finally began the training regiment, which I am excited about for several reasons:

1. It makes the time move faster

2. It makes the time move faster

You wouldn't imagine the amount of downtime you have where you do absolutely nothing, so you have to find creative things to fill your time; I have been spending my time going to the gym and enrolling in college, and of course chatting it up with people on facebook and skype.

Today was especially fun we trained with some Army instructors in MAC-P (Modern Army Combative Program) here is the link to the web site if you are interested in learning more about it http://www.moderncombatives.org/home.html

In short in looks like MMA fighting close distance self-defense type stuff. These guys were MAC-P Instructors and they love to make you do PT (Physical Training). We started out doing 250 jumping jacks as the warm up, and I was not prepared for that. The PT lasted about 20 minutes consisting of several different style push-ups some I have never seen before, and several different styles of sit-ups all back to back with no resting periods. This showed me just how out of shape & fat I really am, so I have work to do. Afterward we moved to the combat training with instruction on several striking techniques, grappling and some really effective choke holds that can stop an attacker in 8-10 seconds; that’s fun for the whole family, needless to say they had me tapping out real quick. Overall the training was outstanding and I signed up for more during my downtime hours I figure if I have nothing to do might as well fill my time up with something constructive.

Special thanks go out to Jimmy Turner for helping Lindsay with a dead car battery and to Kristen for inviting Lindsay over for dinner. Thanks Jimmy & Kristen. Also want to thank all those folks who reached out to Lindsay through phone calls and going out to dinner. Thanks to all who are helping make this more bearable.

Also want to say thanks to the folks at JPS who I assigned EHS tasks while I am away. I really appreciate your efforts and willingness to help. It really means a lot to me.

Love you all and God bless

To be continued…

The New Normal

So when my Dad and I drove home from the airport he said, "So now it's time for the New Normal." I have thought about this phrase quite a bit in the last few days. It especially came to mind this past Tuesday, as I got up and did my morning routine... fed the dogs and left the house. It was strange thinking I am going to do all these things minus one for 320 days... I realized this week all the things David usually doesthat I sometimes overlook; calling me at 7:11am to make sure I am up, feeding and letting the dogs out, getting the mail, taking the trash out, setting the thermostat, turning out the lights, putting gas in my car and the list goes on. I am so thankful for this man! I miss his sweet hugs the most though!

The picture you see in this post is the NEW NORMAL. This is how we spend time together!

This week though has been good. God is growing within me soooo much. He is sustaining me, strengthing me, and He is teaching me that in all things I can be thankful! I also see how God is using both David and I and our marriage to encourage others. It's funny how I am learning to be a better wife in David's absence. But God is showing me that I am complete and whole in HIM, it is not David that completes me, God gave me David to complement me. My mom says that when 2 people are in a God Centered and healthy relationship that you begin to see the other grow and become the people God wants us to be. David and I know that putting God first and loving God more is really putting one another first as well, because as we each grow closer to God the more close we become to one another. I have committed this year to becoming more like the Proverbs 31 woman, I want to strive to be a Godly wife and woman! You can read the passage below! I really see how especially the highlighted parts pertain to me as David is away!

Signing off,
THE WIFE

Epilogue: The Wife of Noble Character

 10. A wife of noble character who can find? 
   She is worth far more than rubies. 
11. Her husband has full confidence in her 
   and lacks nothing of value. 
¹² She brings him good, not harm,     
   all the days of her life.            (side Note: HOW AWESOME!!
¹³ She selects wool and flax 
   and works with eager hands. 
¹⁴ She is like the merchant ships, 
   bringing her food from afar. 
¹⁵ She gets up while it is still night; 
   she provides food for her family 
   and portions for her female servants. 
¹⁶ She considers a field and buys it; 
   out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. 
¹⁷ She sets about her work vigorously; 
   her arms are strong for her tasks. 
¹⁸ She sees that her trading is profitable, 
   and her lamp does not go out at night. 
¹⁹ In her hand she holds the distaff 
   and grasps the spindle with her fingers. 
²⁰ She opens her arms to the poor 
   and extends her hands to the needy. 
²¹ When it snows, she has no fear for her household; 
   for all of them are clothed in scarlet. 
²² She makes coverings for her bed; 
   she is clothed in fine linen and purple. 
²³ Her husband is respected at the city gate, 
   where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. 
²⁴ She makes linen garments and sells them, 
   and supplies the merchants with sashes. 
²⁵ She is clothed with strength and dignity; 
   she can laugh at the days to come. 
²⁶ She speaks with wisdom, 
   and faithful instruction is on her tongue. 
²⁷ She watches over the affairs of her household 
   and does not eat the bread of idleness. 
²⁸ Her children arise and call her blessed; 
   her husband also, and he praises her: 
²⁹ “Many women do noble things, 
   but you surpass them all.” 
³⁰ Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; 
   but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. 
³¹ Honor her for all that her hands have done, 
   and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

Part A is Complete, Now on to Part B

Hello all,

Well its been a crazy week, with a lot of waiting in long lines and running around from place to place to just get cleared for moving on to Fort Dix (part B), sadly several folks did not make it through and had to be sent back due to different reasons.

Well today was my first military flight, and it was interesting.

That's us boarding the C40, if you look at the box truck next to the plane that's several of us loading our gear onto the plane, it was the first time that I have flown that we had to actually load the plane, welcome to the military. My morning started out great as I got a short video from my niece of her doing a David dance, some of you may not know what that is but its quite special and that's all I will say about that, however the video just started out my day on a happy note, thanks Brian for sending that forward.

So I arrived to Fort Dix about 2pm,

Upon landing I realized that in this group of sailors that their was one that I knew from when I first began to drill with the Navy, and of course we had a small reunion, its a small world after all, on top of that he was placed in my group, so that makes 4 close contacts that I have going in to Kuwait.

The Navy Reserves is a fairly small community so its not to uncommon to run into someone you once knew.

I am in good spirits, even though I miss home and of course my beautiful wife, who I cant wait to see soon. I enjoy serving in the military, but life with Lindsay is hard to beat.

So far Fort Dix has not appeared as bad as I once heard, you just have to keep a positive attitude with what ever  happens and make the best of what ever situation you are in.

Love you all, and God Bless you

Another Great Navy Day

  Hello all,

Today was another great Navy day the weather was 70 degress with a warm breeze, the only thing missing was Lindsay to hang out with.

Well lets just do a recap of the todays events:

This morning we started out at medical to get a couple of shots, Anthrax and Hep B, followed by Dental and a very very long hearing test...Can you hear me now?...just kidding.

Later on we moved on to gas mask fitting and testing,

"Luke I am your Father"




Anyway,












So here is the schedule so far:
I  will fly out on Saturday on a C40

I wonder if they will let me fly it?

I will be at Fort Dix for 5 weeks and then off to the land of camels and sand and heat, and more camels. Lots of camels. Just kidding I may never even see one the whole time there.

Overall its not been to crazy yet, I feel like things will move at a much faster pace once I get into Fort Dix.

Thanks for your continued emails so far they are most helpful.

DC